A result in topology stATing thAT a continuous vector field on a sphere is always zero somewhere. The name comes from the fact thAT you can' t flATten all the hair on a hairy ball, like a tennis ball, there will always be a tuft somewhere (where the tangential projection of the hair is zero). An immediATe corollary to this theorem is thAT for any continuous map f of the sphere into itself there is a point x such thAT f(x)=x or f(x) is the antipode of x. Another corollary is thATAT any moment somewhere on the Earth there is no wind. (2002-01-07)